And
the Scrooge Award Goes to...
I
never have to check the calendar to see if the Christmas
season is approaching. As soon as the “season to be
jolly” approaches all those jolly-challenged people
begin their sniping. I think Jack Frost is nipping at more
than their noses and some people are nipping at more than
hot chocolate.
The Christmas season is filled with tradition. The newest
tradition to arrive on bobsled is the annual war on Christmas.
I wait for this annual tradition with baited breath. (Actually,
it's eggnog.) In fact, I refuse to start putting up any
Christmas decorations until the war begins. After all, protocol
is important to me, and a tradition is a tradition.
It seems a little incongruent to me that those who are
antiwar are usually the ones behind the war on Christmas.
I guess war is okay depending on the person who starts it
and what you are against.
It is hard to justify that the one time of year given to
"good cheer" someone is complaining about the
"good cheer." Of all the things in our world to
complain about, I am surprised that this even registers
on somebody's radar. How the war on Christmas trumps the
war on poverty is something I guess I will never understand.
However, some "powers that be,” call a moratorium
on all other areas of the world to complain about and condemn
Christmas. Do not let this get around, but I believe that
these complaining are somehow related to the Tribe of Nincompoops.
It may be my imagination but it seems this tribe increases
every year. The more they increase in number the more they
decrease in intelligence.
Charles Dickens in his novel The Christmas Carol tried
his best to destroy this tribe by having Ebenezer Scrooge
converted. No question, Scrooge who hated Christmas became
the biggest supporter of Christmas that ever was.
What Dickens does not reveal in his novel is that Ebenezer
Scrooge, prior to his conversion, had an affair with the
Wicked Witch of the West. This love child was named Nincompoop
who begat the tribe of Nincompoops whose descendents are
evidenced today. Their claim to fame, as it were, is that
they hate Christmas.
I must point out, to their credit, that they do not hate
everything about Christmas. Like every other hypocrite,
they pick and choose what they like and what they hate.
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Of course, everybody knows what they hate about Christmas.
But what they do not want you to know is what they really
like about Christmas.
For example, those who hate Christmas and are offended
by the idea of it are never offended by Christmas Day off
with pay. In fact, no self-depraved Nincompoop would work
on Christmas Day. It is against their religion.
Nor, are they offended by receiving their annual Christmas
bonus. They start looking for this beginning in January.
In their deflated mind, they see no connection between Christmas
and their Christmas bonus. The one does not create the other.
Where do they think the Christmas bonus comes from? Maybe
they think it comes from the same origin that they came
from...a monkey somewhere. Only a guess on my part.
Then, try to have a Christmas party and not invite any
Nincompoop. I have been to many Christmas parties and I
have noted the many Nincompoops. Every party has its share
of Nincompoops. I just cannot figure them out. They insist
that they come from monkeys but at Christmas parties, they
act like donkeys.
I have yet to see any of these people refuse a Christmas
present. They are one of the first to put their name in
to the gift exchange hat when it comes around the office.
They look forward to unwrapping their Christmas present
just like anybody else.
In spite of all this, they claim to be offended by Christmas.
Of all the things to complain about and to be offended by
this one should not even rate a consideration.
Many of these Nincompoops own stores where people shop
for Christmas presents. I have yet to find one of these
stores closed during the Christmas shopping season. They
want me to spend my Christmas bonus money there and buy
all my Christmas presents there but I am not permitted to
say "Merry Christmas."
If these people really do not like the Christmas season
I suggest they spend the Christmas season in Timbuktu. I'll
chip in on the bus fare... one-way.
I am a little disconcerted about all of this complaining
and being offended by Christmas. It's my holiday, let me
enjoy it. After all, I don't complain about nor am I offended
by their holiday... April 1.
"And, lo, the angel of the Lord came upon them, and
the glory of the Lord shone round about them: and they were
sore afraid. And the angel said unto them, Fear not: for,
behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall
be to all people. For unto you is born this day in the city
of David a Saviour, which is Christ the Lord. And this shall
be a sign unto you; Ye shall find the babe wrapped in swaddling
clothes, lying in a manger. And suddenly there was with
the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God,
and saying, Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace,
good will toward men." (Luke 2:9-14 KJV).
There is no humbug about celebrating the Reason for the
Season.
by
James
Snyder
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